Friday, July 30, 2010

Mastering Time



Have you ever struggled with one thing?  Every day? Your whole life? 

I struggle with time. 

Time has mastered me.  I, however, have not mastered time. 

This has been a constant source of disgruntlement for me.  And, since I married the man who is late if he's on time... well...  you get the picture. 

It's a character flaw.  My dear sweet hubby pointed this out to me.  Wow.  I'm already known for being hard on myself, and having a "flaw" pointed out by the man who knows and loves me most...  Well, it hurt.  Like spikes through the heart, poking out your designer t-shirt, hurt.  What miffed me more was, it was true. Its been chafing at me since.

Growing up, my parents were very lax with disciplines, boundaries, expectations and most everything else.  They vacillated between being too lax or too stringent.  Once I remember getting "grounded till Jesus comes" and my prior non existent curfew was set for 7:30 pm (on a Friday no less). I was 16 - this was excruciating.  There weren't very many consistent rules in my home.  As I got older, I vowed that I wouldn't make the "mistakes" that my parents did, or parent in the same way.  I was determined that I wouldn't be a product of my environment.

I'm a grown up now - I must take responsibility for my actions.

Fast forward to today and I am a parent myself.  A young parent no less.  I have been striving to raise my kids in a climate that would be opposite of what I was raised in.  In some areas I've excelled and others... well, lets just say I'm breaking habits.  And God is bringing a lot of residue to the surface that needs to be dealt with.  One of these areas is my lack of discipline with time management. 

I'm smart enough to know being late for work is a no-no.  And my kids weren't late to school one time last year (no kidding!).  So, I got those down...  But... anything else?  I can be counted on to be exactly 5-7 minutes late.  Fashionable? Maybe.  Rude? YES!  And the worst part - I KNOW it.  Ugh.

Example: Sunday mornings I will go through the list of what I need to do to get ready as I lay there hitting my snooze.  As I pound the snooze every 10 minutes, I cross something off that list.  5:55 am - Well, I won't curl my hair today.  6:05 am - Ok, I'll wear the shirt that doesn't need to be ironed. 6:15 am - I'll just throw my hair back in a pony tail.  6:25 am - CRAP!   Rush Rush Rush - fly out the door to my family waiting in the car as they watch me hobble with one shoe on, carrying the other shoe in my hand that is clasping a bracelet on my wrist, and buttoning my shirt, all at the same time. It's a bad example.

When I get in the car, 6.45 minutes behind schedule, I enter into the realm of silence.  Nate gives me one disparaging look that says, "You're killing me Smalls. Really."

Want to hear a funny story?  Well, it's funny now.  At the moment it was anything but.

Enter the fairly newly married couple with a newborn baby boy. 

One Sunday morning, as the Wife is racing around to get ready, (after hitting said snooze button multiple times) the Husband decides that he is tired of waiting, and doesn't want to be as late as the Wife is going to make him.  So he hollers up the stairs.  "I'm leaving... see you there!"  The Wife, in her panic to hurry, is in her walk in closet when the Husband says this, and doesn't hear him leave.  True to form, about 7 minutes later, the Wife appears, frantic and harried, but clothed and semi decent, to discover an empty house.  The Wife immediately starts muttering under her breath and stomping around.  Tucking the baby boy into his car seat and nestling his car seat in the back seat of the Expedition, the Wife slams the door, still muttering. 

Now, the fairly newly married couple lived quite a ways from their church, and had to travel a relatively long distance via the highway.  As the Wife guns the gas and merges onto the highway, she notices that in her haste to leave, she left her cell phone at home.  Nice.  The ride is uneventful for a few miles.  That is, until the car started to shudder and quake.  The Wife looks down at her gas gauge as the car gives one final quiver and shuts off.  Out of gas.  On the Highway. Late for Church.  This is the exact moment that precious baby boy wakes up and begins to wail.  At this point, the Wife is snarling mutiny at the Husband (even though she knows she is the one who was late). 

The Wife sits on the side of the highway as cars go zipping down the lanes for about 30 minutes, when she sees flashing lights behind her.  The Wife promptly bursts into tears, rolls down her window and pours her tardy story out to the officer who comes to her rescue.  AAA is called and 45 minutes from start to finish, the Wife gets back on the road and continues her trek. 

While this is going on, unbeknownst to the Husband, he is sitting on the platform, scanning the congregation for the Wife.  He begins to get nervous and slightly worried.  The double doors in the back of the sanctuary burst wide open.  The Wife, hauling a carseat on her hip, diaper bag on her shoulder, hair askew, and eyes swollen, walks in extreme vexation to a seat nearest the back.  The Husband, who knows by now, something bad happened when he left the Wife, feels a storm cloud coming on.  He fervently starts praying...

HA!  Did I learn my lesson?  No... unfortunately, I have made my family late many times since that day.  You'd think I'd get it together.  I'm smart, creative, funny (have I mentioned funny?), polite (mostly) and know better. 

One of my desires is to wake up early.  Church days and non church days.  I need that time alone, house quiet, Word in hand, mind clear, before the bedlam of the day begins.  You know that scripture "The Spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak."? 

I am a weaksauce snooze button hitting lady

It's time for change. 

So, let this stand as my accountability post. 

I, Janelle Hyatt, a chronically late, hurried, rushed, and stressed mother of two, wife to a prompt man, hereby do solemnly declare that I am going to manage my time better.  I will do my best to get my booty out of bed when the alarm goes off WITHOUT a snooze respite.  I will be a master of my time.  I choose this day to respect the time of those around me.  I will set an example to my children that they can be proud to follow. I will conquer this.

I'm going to try anyways... 

Who's with me?

Thursday, July 29, 2010

Can you hear that?...

Shhh....

Do you hear that? 

The sound of the washer running, the dishwasher rinsing, the floors sparkling and the clean clothes happily folded and put away for the day?? 

It's the sound of the first day of school. 

This summer was a LONG one and a HOT one.  Long and hot days = extreme boredom = restlessness = bickering kids = time out = stressed mom = extra guilt imposed on self by said stressed mom = loong day(s). 

This was, looking back, the most uneventful and somewhat disappointing summer we've had so far.  I'm glad its over, and glad to look forward to cooler days and a schedule.

Wow, I sound like a pessimist.  I'm not. Well, not always anyways.

The plans we had for the summer all went down the toilet after receiving Madeleine's hospital bill (You may remember this post about Maddie getting stung by a scorpion).  We received the bill a few weeks later, and after we had picked up our eye balls from the floor and popped them back in, we had to cancel all plans made for the summer. Ugh.  Frustrating.

So, we stayed home, swam a lot, sweated a lot and had many introspective discoveries this summer.

Some things we discovered were

-kids can start picking on one another as soon as they get out of bed
-Jalepenos are a really good tactic for talking back/sassing/tattling/mean words.  Don't worry, I just rubbed a little piece on a tongue and gave a sermonette about the tongue being the most powerful member of our body. It worked for a few days. If needed, you can just rub and repeat.
-Swimming is a great activity and it's FREE
-Money is stressful. period. enough said.
-There is no possible way for a house to stay clean during summer vacation. IMPOSSIBLE.
-If your children feed a stray cat to get the reward from the neighborhood signs, and the owner ends up being a "no-show" doesn't mean that you get a free cat.  You get a free pest, complete with cat hair. Though it is nice to have a little purring machine sit on your feet while you blog.
-Don't mention the "pound" "Humane Society" in front of your kids regarding the afore mentioned feline. 
-Mint grows like crazy and chokes out all the other herbs you may have planted around it. But is great in lemonade and served with homemade peach sorbet.
-In AZ there is indeed such a thing as butt body water.  I've had sweat in places I never knew about.
-Eating Popsicle's in front of an air conditioner vent and giggling with your kids is timeless entertainment.
-Sometimes God tests you in ways that seem so irritating, but are SO necessary.
-Guilt is never the way to change yourself.
-You can be too hard on yourself (Thanks for the straight words Andrea) Show yourself some grace, you're only human after all.
-Dr. Neil Anderson's book "Freedom from Fear" is a must read.
-When your kids love learning it changes every stigma about school.
-Kids are the best spiritual mirror a parent can have - Good Lord, I have been convicted this summer.
-Mac N Cheese is NOT healthy in any way shape or form... 
-It's lovely when family comes to visit and it's lovely when they leave.
-God is much bigger than a church and can blow your mind in your own living room
-I may have snuck a Starbucks coffee 6x once or twice this summer
-Budgets stink, but are totally necessary (see above)
-Music soothes the savage beast
-My kids are now having a love affair with 'The Golden Oldies" and are known to walk around singing "If you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife..." and "Yakkity yak - Don't talk back!".
-The library reading program can save your summer.
-Discovering how to be content in what ever state you may be in is a tough test, and once I accomplish that I'll let you know.  In the meantime, I will pray for grace and my 'tude every day. 

and... 

The list could go on... and on... and on...

So, I'll stop. 

Oh, one thing I did learn this summer was how to give myself a pedicure (budget again) and do a home facial.

Here was my favorite facial I found over the summer.  My face felt firm and glowed like a light bulb afterwards. Jane Austen would liken it to "incandescence" but I liken it to a light bulb.  Humph.  =)

Asprin Facial

4-6 uncoated asprin tablets
1/2 tsp baking soda
1/4 tsp honey


(Still taking photos on my iphone - whose lens is smudged - obviously!) WHOOPS!

Place your asprin tablets in a smidge of water - just enough to dissolve them completely but not cover them.
Stir in baking soda and dash of honey. Stir up and let get all foamy. Rub gently onto face (avoid nostrils and eyes) and allow to "set" for 10-15 minutes.  Rinse thoroughly. Voila!  A shiney, clean, soft and firm face. 

Let me know if you try it!

Happy end of summer all!